A CLUB TO BE PROUD OF

 

Printed in the National League South game v Hampton and Richmond Borough Saturday 26th April 2025. Last game of the season. We won 1-0 in front of 1,583

Bananas by Mark Davis

And so another season comes to an end. One where we briefly topped the table and one where we briefly looked over our shoulders at the relegation trap door.

Of course I want Slough to win football matches, but as I get older, I take a more holistic and realistic view.

It wasn’t so long ago that a group of us would meet in the pub opposite Stag Meadow, the home of Windsor and Eton, where Slough had washed up after losing Wexham Park. We’d laugh and joke and then realise it was time for kick off – where inevitably 90 minutes of football would spoil a good day out. A lot of those people are now volunteering for the club and its hard not to forget just how much of a basket-case the Rebels were. Penniless and plummeting down the leagues, homeless for nearly 15 years, around 300 of us keeping the faith and hoping things could turn around. And blimey haven’t they just.

Signing that 50 year lease from the council has turbo charged the club off the field. I couldn’t make the forum but briefly spoke to co-owner Ash about next season.

With the National League South getting stronger, lots of supporters are already worrying about next season! What will the club be doing to make sure we stay competitive?

Ash “We are enhancing the playing budget for next season to ensure we remain competitive. Although we firmly believe we have one of the best young managers, fantastic facilities and an exciting momentum off the pitch which will allow us to perform to the desired standard of the NLS.”

The Club has made massive strides off the pitch since we signed the lease – what are you most proud of?

“For me success isn’t just about wins or milestones, but about sustained, meaningful progress and the ripple effect it has. Creating growth both in the club and the community means you’re building something lasting, something that brings people together and uplifts more than just the team.”

I then spoke to our community manager Ade – a supporter for 45 years - about what happens when we all head off to the potting shed. “When the season finishes and fans enjoy a well earned rest, Arbour Park (AP) continues to see increasing occupancy of its rooms, pitch and facilities. For the club, the off season is often busier than during the season. AP has regular corporate bookings throughout the year, ranging from business meetings, health workshops, conferences and training curses and due to our excellent facilities and on-site parking, these continue to grow .

‘Our EDS and Academy will still use AP for training and education whilst you will see many football finals continue to be held here. Also our proximity to the crematorium makes AP and ideal space for wakes. With no football at weekends, AP will host far more parties during the summer than usual.

‘The gym, run by JA Fitness, continues to grow in its opportunities now that there is a 2nd personal trainer involved and session include small groups, one to ones, junior workshops and mum and baby groups being held regularly.

‘With the football club focusing on the local community, its summer activities continue with a desire to increase our offerings. There will be no stopping for our toddler football, kids football, disability sessions and walking football. With weekends free, the club plays host to various football tournaments including junior football, ladies tournament, corporate competitions and community projects all booked in for the ‘ off season’.

‘The club will continue to improve its facilities over the summer and please look out for some volunteer working parties coming up in the next couple of months.”

Too many football supporters want to be spoonfed a diet of instant success. A pill to pop to cure defeats, a new chairman who will promise the earth and to hell with the consequences. That’s not how Slough Town work and that’s a very good thing.

It’s been a really enjoyable season, we’ve had lots of laughs, made new friends, bashed more bins than I care to remember and visited places old and new.

Infact I’m more proud of the club than I’ve ever been; it has become a massive part of the community, an important institution for the town. And for a few of us, all this is so much more enjoyable because not so very long ago we were huddled together, losing to another village team and howling on the empty terraces that ‘All we wanted was a football ground in Slough’.

Well, we’ve got that now and so much more with bells on. See you next season.

ANOTHER WELCOME SEASON IN THE NATIONAL LEAGUE SOUTH

 

Printed in the National League South game v Borehamwood Good Friday 18th April 2025  We lost 4-2 in front of 1,027 

As my train trundled towards Torquay and the season hurtled towards its conclusion, you can’t help but start to wonder about next seasons adventures – especially now we are safe.

So is the National League South the most exciting league in the country? It’s certainty tight and all the big hitters are up there as you would expect, so who would we like to wave goodbye too? A day trip to Truro is not for the faint hearted so off they pop. Would Carlisle v Truro be a Guinness Book of Records longest football league trip ever?

I’ve visited every ground in our league apart from Enfield (on holiday in Weymouth at the time), so be good to go somewhere new. But it isn’t looking promising.

Merthyr look set to win the Southern Premier and I love a trip to the Valleys to stuff my face with Welsh cakes. Except they could potentially be put in the North. That's because we could be welcoming Dagenham and fingers, knees and toes crossed - Maidenhead United along with Ebbsfleet

Poor old Ebbsfleet have spent a bloody fortune, to get nowhere fast. They’ve kindly taken over the lease of the nearby Rose Pub to save it for the local community so its a welcome return to that friendly, local backstreet boozer.

So will Maidenhead once again manage the Great Escape? Their chairman has admitted with their proposed ground move scuppered they are haemorrhaging money, and really it can’t be long before they come and join us over here.

Dagenham and Redbridge would make a change...haven’t been there for a long time when they were a regular Isthmian opponent and we spent our life's travelling around the M25. But you can keep Wealdstone and Woking.

The Isthmian is tight. I’ve never been to Horsham's new ground which would be near-my-house handy. Cray Valley Paper Mills sounds fun if you like stationary. I love Dartford's ground and the ethos behind it. Former Tory Leader of Dartford council spelt out years ago what a new football stadium can do for an area. “Everyday, councils throw bucket loads of money at schemes to deal with anti-social behaviour, childhood obesity, community cohesion, civic pride and community relations. Here in Dartford, we took the view that rather than fund a series of expensive here today- gone tomorrow initiatives, we would invest in football as a catalyst for all those things.” Its certainty seems to be the philosophy adopted by our owners.

But no thanks Billericay Dicky. Or Dover. Hashtag United could still scrape into the play-offs; a gimmick of a club that play at Aveley in front of no one and you’ve got to wonder what’s the actually point. And what about Dulwich Hamlet, who bring carnival to football matches. Despite still attracting massive crowds they could be relegated from the Isthmian Premier. I know crowds aren’t everything but blimey, too much partying and not enough concentrating on the football?

The Southern Premier? Well no one wants a trip to the permanently angry Havant and Watermoanville. And we went to Gloucester to watch Truro play their home games. Maybe that’s why Truro’s attendances are now up over 600% ! I’ve been to Totton's old ground but not been to the new one; the New Forest is nice and also has donkeys but last time I ended up in Mrs. Miggins tea shop when looking for some food. So let’s go for Dorchester, so we can stay in Weymouth on the razzle as its much more fun than that sleepy market town.

As for next season and what Slough supporters want. I will leave you with a quote from the editor of the entertaining ‘Where's the Bar?’ Fanzine. ‘Wealdstone are now in their fifth season back in the National League; for a while the idea of visiting Wrexham, Notts County, Grimsby or Stockport as equals filled al us Stones fans whatever our age with a warm glow. But these trips are starting to remind me why I follow non league in the first place: rolling out of the bar just before kick off, standing where you want, changing ends at half time, plenty of opportunity to exchange opinions with the locals. At Oldham the seventy seven Wealdstone supporters were herded into the most distant corner of a totally empty stand, not allowed near the pitch, not allowed behind the goal, policed by an army of jack booted stewards….The National League is non-league football...it would be nice if some of its constituent clubs remembered this and dropped their delusions of grandeur.’

As I handed over my £20 to be stuck in the corner with no bar and nothing to eat at Torquay I know what he meant. Deano spent the majority of the game having to move the flags by stewards who seemed to be fed up with ridiculous rules being fostered on us. I did manage to persuade them that the tambourine was part of my Morris Dancing religion. Really tho, your Division 6, act like it.

And as the results rolled in, we were safe and another season of National League South will do me just fine.

DONKEY RIDING

 

Printed in the National League South game v Aveley Saturday 5th April 2025 We won 3-0 in front of 751  

Football is a welcome distraction in a world full of tyrants and people who only seem to want to inflict misery on us all. A bit of fun which we’ve had in bucketfuls supporting Slough Town over the past few weeks; even two poor away performances couldn’t dampen the spirits. Well, they did a bit, but hey ho.

Still, what a day at Hornchurch. It started with an Upminster pub crawl where Doable Dave recalled his pooh sticks experiment in the Bath City men's urinals, where the loos are so ancient they’ve got a National Trust protection order. His stick floated through the men's to the ladies loos and into, well I dread to think where, knowing how much has been invested in our sewage systems. That was apparently as exciting as the Bath game got. We then met some Tamworth fans in another uncomfortable Taproom where I needed a step ladder to get onto the chairs. They moaned about the National League because of the lack of real ales in nearby neighbourhoods and had taken a detour to drink some flat liquid that contained centipede legs and eye of newt sprinkled with essence of arsenic. I’m not sure what I ordered, but I think I found where Dave’s pooh stick ended up. Mind you, the Brown Boys did enjoy the Great Wall of Cider while Gaz got given a dog bowl. Meanwhile, at the ground Andy the Map had led half the away support to a housing estate rather than a watering hole because, well he had his map upside down. At half time you had to call a cab to get to the bar as it was so far away and at 2-1 down after 45 minutes, you couldn’t help think - here we go again. But finally, finally, we won away and the Slough supporters partied like, well like we hadn’t won away for four months.

Non League Day was fun with bells on and somehow it felt even more special this time round; so many deals across the country – crowds up 12% since last year with a total attendance in Steps 1-4 of nearly 150,000. It was no different at Arbour Park. Bumper crowd, queues at the turnstiles, youngsters everywhere and a brilliant turn out from Enfield Town supporters who most Slough fans agreed would like them to say up. Deano had been on the piste skiing and missed the fun at Hornchurch but was back in time for his debut in the dugout with his Supporters Trust sidekick Richard, becoming co-assistant managers for the day. Let’s just say ‘You’re getting sacked in the morning’ before a ball had even been kicked was probably the most polite chant they got all game. Hopefully we raised lots of money for Thames Hospice along with another precious point towards safety.

Weymouth should be given an extra 10 points at the beginning of the season, just cos its such a great place to visit. Although I suppose on that logic Canvey Island would be relegated before a ball was even kicked. Bars, beach, a harbour and more bars, and it always seems sunny– you can even ride on a donkey if you’re that way inclined. And I’m not sure if Mitch, Caz, a freshly shaven Cameron and the gang are still in some nightclub enjoying 90’s songs on repeat.

Pre match we danced with the mascot and the DJ played ParkLife. The write up of the game said our ‘raucous following deserved a far better showing’ because, well the least said about the football the better.

The first time Slough played in Weymouth, Keiran WonderWall proposed to my missus on the beach, while I was fetching ice creams for the kids. Infact Weymouth away should have been one of those Kieran adventures. As we belted out his song with one of his daughters at the Farnborough home game, Siobhan Wall then played a post match set in the main bar. As I legged it back to Brighton I still had his song ringing in my ears.

So ditch that Premier League habit, it’s full of delusional everyones-out-to-get-us top six conspiracy theorists, dodgy owners that would make the Krays blush, and sit down/shut up stewarding– and all this jazz will cost you a fortune. Instead why not join the Rebel Rabble for some adventures of a lifetime, where you wake up on a Sunday morning still smiling. Or clinging onto a donkey for dear life.