ANOTHER SEASON IN THE NATIONAL LEAGUE SOUTH

 

Printed in the National League South game v Torquay United Saturday 11th April 2026  We lost 5-1 in front of 1,292

It was the point that just about mathematically cemented another season in the National League South – and as an added bonus put a dent in our nearest and dearest rivals play off hopes. Who doesn’t love a 98 minute equaliser, after being two down then a mass brawl as they beers and songs flowed. ‘No one likes to see those scenes’ as 2 million viewed them on social media.

Now it’s time to start looking at next seasons line up. I wont shed any tears for losing Chippenham or Bath but Eastbourne? That’s just rude. And Enfield. I’ve always had a soft spot for the first football owned club in the country. They should have saddled themselves with hundreds of thousands worth of debt and they might have survived.

Folkestone are on their way which could be an away weekend. Walton and Hersham is near but play in a stadium that I’ve not heard glowing reports about. Hopefully it will be more fun than the last time I went to Hersham. I got totally lost in the pouring rain one Tuesday evening trying to find their old Stompond Road ground. This was a world before phones and it seemed anyone on the streets who I could ask for directions. I arrived just before half time starving and soaked. I could only get a burger bun with onions and cheese - then the game got called off before the second half started. I sat freezing waiting for the train back home questioning my sanity after seeing no football but feeling like I'd wet my pants.

I wanted Farnborough relegated until we visited the other weekend; the friendliest club in the world; cheap to get in and no doubt in a gesture to placate their disgruntled fans a free pint when you bought two. As you would expect the Rebel Rabble made sure they also enjoyed this offer and the place was packed with noisy, inebriated Slough in their impressive stadium.

No one would ever wish to go to Chelmsford again – and now its an even worse offer with segregation. They’ve always had some muppet supporters – in Sloughs worst ever season they beat us 5-0 - but still their former Canvey Island King manager abused us. Then as we left some toothless grinning idiot threatened me and Nigel, who politely reminded him after another Slough Town thrashing there really wasn’t any need for more unpleasantness. If only Nigel had bought his shaving foam, we could have given him a short back and sides. Still Deano decided to spend his birthday there with 40 other hardy Slough supporters and still a few of their dickhead fans tried to kick off. Fair play to their club for apologising and banning two of them. Mind you that incident got us segregated at Ebbsfleet, which is another nice ground but still think the name Gravesend and Northfleet United should have had a preservation order on it. They were all good as gold apart from confiscating Nigel's shaving foam, although he managed to sneak in his scat-a-cat. Then they had to spoil their hospitality with two late goals to win it but hats off to the club for saving the local pub by buying it.

Selfishly I don’t want Worthing to go up, Dorking you can have a lovely historic drink but its a terrible stand for away fans. Torquay you can stay, cos its nice to be beside the seaside. Although not so kiss-me-quick fun paying £22 to get in.

So who else will be joining us? I’ve never been to Farnham. I like their owners honesty when it comes to revenue streams and trying out new ideas to attract punters; although having a big budget and winning most of your games is probably the one that gets people through the turnstiles. Berkhamsted has a lovely pub by the canal. We could sack off the coach and all go by barge. You can make some ceramics at Poole. I’ve never been to Brentwood but you can keep Billericay. Could Burgess Hill sneak in? Would make up for Eastbourne a bit, although I wouldn’t recommend a holiday there.

So whose coming down? It’s back to Cornwall to play Truro. And the long, winding train to Braintree. I reckon stick both of them in the North for a laugh and move Merthyr to the South so I can get my teeth stuck into some proper Welsh cakes. How about Eastleigh? We haven’t been there for years and they have certainty spruced up the place. You can even do some plane spotting if Heathrow doesn’t satisfy your aviation needs.

Still the minor miracle is that little old Slough have done it again. Against all the odds, against half the teams being full time and spending a fortune trying to escape (which I suppose Eastbourne Borough have managed, just not the way they had hoped). On small crowds, young players, players being constantly poached and community activities through the roof we’ve had another season to be proud of.

And I mean, who doesn’t want to come and visit sunny old Slough?

FINANCIAL MELTDOWN

Printed in the Good Friday game v Maidenhead United National League South Friday 3rd March 2026.  We drew 2-2 in front of 1,934

We all want our football clubs to do well – but at what cost? Should we try and reach for the stars and bugger the consequences?

No one likes seeing their best players poached. Especially near the end of the season and especially to a team in your league; but what do you do if someone offers you money and the player has the chance to play full time football? And if you don’t sell he will leave for free in six weeks time.

I’ve heard eye watering sums of money about how much is spent just trying to run a National League South side. A million a season at Eastbourne Borough? Not that it has done them much good, as another popular kiss-me-quick seaside trip looks like its going down the sewage pipe.

Dorking Wanderers revenue is estimated at around £5.2 million! They’ve been hoovering up the best players in their push to be champions. But is there a glass ceiling for a market town team with a three sided ground coming up against ex league football giants? Meanwhile Torquay lost £742,000 last season and Chelmsford £800,000. One of last seasons relegated teams St.Albans City lost £225,000! Of course you’ve got to dream, but come on, really?

Can you sustain a club on just YouTube followers? Apparently not, as Hashtag United have retreated from the Isthmian Premier asking for voluntary relegation. Their owner is rightly complaining about the financial mess of football, which is a bit ironic as they powered up the leagues with a playing budget that blew everyone else out the way. They are moving in with Redbridge but surely a team has to be rooted in a place, have an identity more than just online likes?

Just over half of the 92 league football clubs have published accounts. Only 4 are profitable. Average pre tax loses? In the Premier League it’s £31.1. million, in the Championship £15.1 million, League One the average loss is £5 million and League Two it’s £2.6 million.

I give you Exhibit A. Port Vale currently bottom of League One lost £6.1 million last season gaining promotion. That’s £117,000 a week. That takes loses to over £17 million from when the company that currently owns it. They’ve got brilliant, forward thinking owners but blimey.

Exhibit B. AFC Wimbledon. As a supporters owned club they just can’t compete financially and are asking supporters if they are should dilute the fan owned model and find investors. One of the founders Ivor Heller said, “Football is out of control. The average loss in League One is £5 million. That’s just unsustainable. It’s insane...Everybody knows over time, if you’ve got constantly the lowest budget in the division, eventually you’re going to fall out of that division. Our problems are simple: our owners, our fans, are probably at the limits of what they can put in.” He said younger fans seem to car less about the value of fan ownership and want the club to find deep-pocketed owners to join the English Football League (EFL) arms race. One EFL owner said that more than half of the 72 clubs only have cashflow to last a month. “Finding a cure is going to be difficult, but there’s still more people going to football outside the Premier League every week than in the Premier League. That is something worth looking after.”

So what about little old Slough? Has it been a good season? On the pitch we’ve seen some brilliant results (I was certainty given a 60th Boxing Day birthday present to remember) but we've struggled with some serious injuries and looked down and out at one point. But I’m also interested in the way clubs run. I don’t want some flash in the pan YouTuber announcements and a hip hop DJ or former premier league star come rushing in all trumpets blowing, promising the earth. That Wrexham ship has sailed, although the wage inflation that they and Birmingham bought to the table is the reason so many clubs are in trouble. I want our club to be built on more than sand and I think it is. So I asked Ash, the Slough Town CEO a few questions.

How would you describe Sloughs financial model?

‘Sustainable but continued growth due to building multiple revenue streams not replying on match day revenue.’

What keeps you awake at night?

‘I sleep like a baby, but running any business is stressful. I have operated my own businesses since 2014 so have learnt how to compartmentalize stress on areas/environments I can't always affect.’

Can you see a time when the club would go full time?

‘I feel within the 2-3 years it will be imperative for us to remain competitive at this level and achieve promotion to the National League.’

With the Football regulator coming over the hill are things about to change? Under new licensing proposals, clubs will have to demonstrate that they have the financial resources to withstand major shocks such as relegation or withdrawal of owner funding – or risk the nuclear option of being banned from competing.

Football clubs are more than ninety minutes on the pitch and play an ever increasing, important role in their communities. Let’s hope the era of boom and bust will soon come to an end.

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